Join for FREE | Take the Tour Lost Password?
Shop deviantART for the
holidays and save BIG!
Click here! :holly:
[x]

deviantART

 


i want to read your body
like neruda poem
written in braille,
my fingers searching
the pages of your skin,
gently brushing away
the hair that falls  
like a silken bookmark
across your face.
i will work my way
down the page, hands
trembling with excitement,
anticipating which words
will follow.
fingers will linger
in some areas, reread,
so that on lonely nights
like this one I will
be able to recite
the subtle nuances of
your neck or the mystery
surrounding your navel.
I would try to interpret
the verse for others,  
but there is no translation
for your lungs breathing
into the palm of my hand,
or your heart, beating
its ancient tribal rhythms
in correspondence with mine.
©2004-2009 ~dreamsnhazel
:icondreamsnhazel:

Author's Comments

.

Daily Deviation

Given 2005-06-30

neruda by ~dreamsnhazel

A quietly remarkable homage reinforcing the depth of love that extended metaphor has the ability to express. (Suggested by ~boundlessgravity and Featured by `ndifference)

Comments


love 2 2 joy 0 0 wow 3 3 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconsensi226:
beautiful
i see you are branching out into the erotic section now.
some of your other poems have had hints of an erotic quality but it is nice to see something like this from you.

:peace:

--
destroying my body is easy, but how do i kill my soul?
:icondreamsofcamelot:
I agree with sensi's comment. I already told you this, but I think this is some of your most fabulous work..it's very descriptive and just beautifully written. You should be really proud of yourself on this one Joneethan!
+fav
:icongirlonstage:
I offically want to have sex with you. :nod:

--
"Good teaching is 1/3 preparation and 3/4 theater" - Gail Goodwin
:icondragonforce03:
This is one of the best. :)
:iconthislilgirl:
omg....i think this is one of my favorite poems ever...as in, out of all that i've read, ever...you should publish this so that everyone can read it and the world can be a little bit of a better place :)
:icondarksoftdangerous:
delicious
:cuddle:

*briskly rubs the hair on the back of her neck, willing it to stop tingling*


:+fav:
:iconmealoncholydeath:
awesome imagery, and i like the way you put your emotion into it. i can relate to the thoughts you put in it.
:iconshimmeringautumn:
This poem is a major turn on if only there were more men like .you bring sensuality in love back into a world that has turned such acts of emotion into dark lustful acts.
:iconi-found-a-hat:
yum.

yum yum yum.

gorgeous and beautiful.

yum.

--
"Part of you pours out of me in these lines from time to time."
-Joni Mitchell
:iconboundlessgravity:
Neruda's my favorite writer, so I'm biased.

Even so, you've done justice to the name. The delicacy and insight of extended metaphor here is powerful and real; it's doublespeak and it works well. I'd like to see more of it, really. I kept wanting to hear something about the spine or the pages and I never did, as the second half moved away from the acts of recitation and translation.

:peace:

--
Your humbleness is showing:

Details

February 4, 2004
974 bytes

Statistics

112
257 [who?]
6,671 (3 today)
580 (0 today)

Share

Link
Thumb

Site Map